Here we see a Hamm’s Hat. Yup. That’s a Hamm’s Hat, alright … wait a minute … it has horns like that other Hamm’s Hat. WAIT! Those aren’t horns! That Hamm’s Hat is giving me the finger! TWICE!
Yes, that’s right … this is arts ‘n crafts at its finest brought to you by Hoss, who took the horns concept to its inevitable conclusion … I gotta say — we got some real talent around here.
And here it is in all its glory:
One from the archives … them cans ain’t a buck seventy-five no mo Ah tell ya whut.
And so began a typical drunkfest day at The Brass Rail, and we see here the venerable Boilermaker wearing a very stylish Bud Hat. But this wasn’t just any ordinary, day … oh no. YouTube was invented! So here below we see a video of Matt doing a little dance. A Bud Hat dance, if you will. To wit:
It kinda sounds like he’s singing that Boner Pills song. Here he goes again, except this time he starts making that bizarre whistling sound that only he can make:
But here’s where things REALLY get good … Matt, in a stroke of genius, turns his Bud Hat into a Bud Vest! That’s Margarita there with the assist.
Success! Genius, I tell you — pure genius.
Sheer and utter brilliance. Not to mention something to wear out on a Saturday night. Just sayin’. And without further ado, a Bud Vest dance.
(What exactly is he doing with his finger?)
Oh man — Trevor hit gold with this one. Using his craftsmanship tools to great aplomb we see our beloved Hoss wearing his Hamm’s Hat as some sort of viking helmet. Impressive to say the least. Not only does it look awesome, but those horns don’t exactly cut themselves. To get them all nice and symmetrical-like, you gotta have some skillz. Having a delicious cool Hamm’s also assists in one’s endeavors.
Here’s a side view:
Hoss’ reward for a job well done:
This work of art is so breathtakingly awesome, it’s earned its own rightful place watching over the drunks patrons at The Rail. Take that Mo‘ai!!
Good times.
Here’s Hoss with a very innovative new approach to the venerable Hamm’s Hat … Awesome!!
Yeah, I know — it’s about time. I’ve been negligent in my Hamm’s Hat Posting Responsibilities (HHPR), and I blame the hotter-than-hell weather and my own lazyness. So without further ado, here is Hoss wearing what has to be the coolest belt I’ve ever seen. Waaay cooler than Batman’s uility belt, or the Hulk’s utility belt, or Johnny Storm’s utility belt, or … ok — I’m way out of my graphic novel league here — I’m sure Hoss can help me out. Anyway, I’d also like to add that this is the 101st post, which in itself makes me awestruck because I have the attention span of a squirrel. Cubs win! Cubs win!
Ok, kiddies … gather ’round. Uncle Coulter here to tell you how to make a Hamm’s Hat. With a snip-snip here, and a pasty-paste there … (this is beginning to sound like a vasectomy how-to, but I digress …)
… and there you have it. Place on thoust head and commence drinkitude forthwith. Huzzah! And PLEASE … clean up your table scraps or no recess for you, young man.
Here’s Thumper wearing a PBR hat at the other bar! We’re a veritable United Fucking Nations.
Quicksilver looking very dashing in his well-manicured Hamm’s Hat. And just in time for Jeopardy!
“What’s not to love?”